So many people spend lifetimes in denial.
I don’t mean being in denial that you’re an alcoholic or something – though there’s plenty of that.
Mostly I mean being in denial that you have a choice. Giving away your own power. Being unwilling to change is denial in its highest art form.
The hardest – and simplest – part of dealing with any existential crisis or big life dilemma is simply to decide to change.
Whatever you’re grappling with, whatever knot you’re trying to untie in your life – should I stay in this relationship? should I get a new job? should I go back to school? – once you stop shirking the question and decide to face up to the fact that LIFE IS ABOUT CHANGE, well, it all becomes so easy.
The Universe is poised and ready to show you the way.
The answers will come readily – they will be right in front of your face.
This is true on even a very small scale. Say you’re faced with a daunting new project at work. Or you’re struggling with a subject that you just can’t “get” at school. Something outside your comfort zone. Something requiring you to be brave.
It’s so easy to just turn your back on it and skate. The seemingly painless solution is to ignore it; to not grapple with the problem; to go into hiding.
That denial thing.
The reason I say “seemingly painless” is because whenever we do this, we are only perpetuating the pain. Putting it off till later – which in effect actually extends it. If you have avoided doing your taxes until midnight on April 14th, it’s not going to get any better when you are finally forced to do them on April 15th – in fact, you will have been dealing with your tax prep agony for even longer based on that delay tactic. Avoiding pain will perpetuate it.
And, you’ve probably had the experience many times before: Once you sit down to do it, the whatever-it-is that you’re unwilling to do, it’s not that bad. It sometimes surprises you and even becomes enjoyable. Certainly the FINISHING of it is – but even the STARTING of it can be oh so sweet. The relief of finally facing up to something.
Of finally being WILLING.
And the thing is, once you have the WILLINGNESS, then it all will fall into place. The worst kind of resistance is internal. Sure there’s opposition – it’s a real thing when you’re trying to accomplish something big – but for most of us, the biggest obstacles are self-created.
With willingness, you are signalling surrender to Eternity. You’re going along with her plan for you. And she will respond in kind. Always.
That project you were intimidated by? That subject in school that you just couldn’t penetrate? Suddenly you’ll start to get answers – in the oddest places.
Driving down the road, you see a billboard for some new invention or technology or seminar that is EXACTLY what you need to learn.
Randomly browsing on the Internet, you stumble on the perfect article that offers the just-right insight that unlocks the puzzle you’ve been so painfully stumped on.
Sitting on the subway, you overhear a conversation where a complete stranger mentions the exact situation you’re grappling with – and talks about how she solved it.
These things will come to you.
All you need is to get started.
And all you need for that is a tiny smidgeon of willingness.