But we often give it away.
And society doesn’t exactly sanction it. A woman being assertive in the business world is often seen as pushy; a man doing the same thing is seen as confident.
Women have a certain advantage on the spiritual path, based on our ability to be more fluid, to surrender. It’s innate. We’re finally in a day and age and culture where women are able to actively, openly pursue a spiritual life.
The problem is that many see it as a trade-off.
Women are frequently motivated to try meditation and begin the work of self discovery when they’re at a low period – which is often triggered by a breakup or a depression cycle around relationships. They’re logged on and committed to their practice… until a new boy (or girl) friend materializes. Once they get another person in the picture, they slack off.
Happens all the time.
Women give away their power.
In an effort to trap and hook this new potential partner, they pour all their energy into him … and have nothing left over for themselves.
To progress on the spiritual path is about accruing and preserving energy. Energy is what takes you higher in each meditation. And energy makes you happy.
When you’re giving all your energy away, you won’t have enough left to get to the next level in your practice.
It’s a voluntary form of enslavement. We hook ourselves to other people willingly, in an attempt to keep them in our lives… in an attempt to stave off the abandonment.
Don’t do that. You can be a giver and do so in a way that’s self-nurturing. Giving as part of a practice of an intentional life can be awesome and beautiful. We can always give more. But don’t do it as a sacrifice of the self. Don’t do it as a means to trap someone – lest you be trapped. Don’t do it without also giving to yourself – which means, meditating every day. Every. Day. Taking the time for yourself. You must recharge the batteries if you’ll have enough to give – and in fact, then the supplies will be plentiful. Neverending.
When you meet someone, and fall in love, don’t forget that the love is coming from inside of you. This other person is merely a trigger, an access point. Give all of yourself to them – but only after you have given yourself to Eternity first. Surrender to the divine inside. Honor it. Dedicate yourself to your spiritual practices. Put those before all and you’ll have all before you.